the most fucked up dream ever... · 09.08.19, 10:17am
In the dream I’m in game, but for some reason we’re camping some HNM in East (or west?) Sarutabaruta, right by the exit from Balga’s Dais where you drop down? I don’t remember what the mob was, but it was supposed to drop something really important for me. And there were Perytons everywhere that were on us except they were bound…and we all got charmed and started running someplace? And I remember the Peryton’s spinning as they followed the person that hate was on…And Darkkaze had come back to the game and was like stalking me or something, I guess because of what happens next.
Cos then I’m like flashed into real life and I’m fucking pregnant? and its his baby? And I get so upset about whatever had happened that I go into labor and my parents are there and take me to the “hospital.” But the hospital turns out to be my grandfather’s apartment in New York, which is all completely the same except his kitchen is like a hospital room. And I start freaking out cos it hurts and I grab the little asian dude who is my doctor and I’m like DRUGS GIVE ME DRUGS and OMG I WANT A C-SECTION. And then I look to the side and there’s some sort of video image of inside my womb and my baby is like super cute with red hair so I stare at that for a while…
And at some point I call Trevor in Florida and I’m like dude, I need you here to distract me. And he comes over with Geoff and my parents attack Geoff?! and he’s like holyshit calm down we’re all here for Jenn and they are like FINE and stop trying to kill him. And somehow during all this my labor like stops and the doctor is like I have no idea wtf and cuts something? to make my water break and I end up just chilling on the couch for a while with Trevor? And we talk about my parents’ freezer at the restaurant and how they want to move it or fix it or something…and is somehow right outside the apartment on the balcony…
And then I get really tired and they put me in the chair, like you know with the foot things to hold ur legs up, and my doctor starts spreading like baby oil all over my body? And I look over to the side and my cousin Steven is there (drunk) and some weird dude is washing his hair and I’m all matter-of-fact like, oh hey you’re rushing some frat? and shaving ur head? and he’s like no I’m getting my hair dyed orange. And then his friend looks at me and is like holy shit dude ur cousins pregnant, and Steven freaks out…
The next part is me waking up alone in the apartment with a baby. And the baby’s name is Solomon. And I TOTALLY flip out over the baby’s name, like screaming angry that who the fuck would name my kid after some biblical figure and this is fucking bullshit and start calling people like screaming/sobbing about how to change it except my phone keeps dropping calls and then going to my voicemail, where there are like 23984203948029 messages from my family for Solomon.
And then I woke up.
* * *
suck it
- I would have to say this beats the hell out of my flying-on-the-back-of-a-winged-cat-over-orange-sand-with-perpendicular-purple-palm-trees-into-a-sunset-portal dream.
— Wade Aug 19, 10:33am #
commenting closed for this article
Pensive Panda...